There is no such thing as good timing.. things never happen conveniently, but it all somehow just balances out in the end. Some things we see coming like a freight train outta Hell; others just seem to materialize like “Beam me up, Scotty!” The abrupt up and down and here and gone has been my reality.. for the most part, I like to believe I handle it well. But, there are times like these when I am just so physically tired that I begin to feel the jarring of the ride a bit more than I’d like to.
I should have seen a lot of things coming, especially as I came to today and tomorrow: the days when I will actually be purchasing my ticket to Nepal and it all becomes a reality. Any time I begin to make moves toward God, something happens to throw me through a loop. I stumbled across a scripture in an email that I didn’t mean to click on just now, though:
Philippians 4:6-7 ” Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the PEACE of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
I realized right then that I will be ok and that I have already been handling things better than I would have in the past. The only explanation for this is that I learning to rely on God’s strength because I have none of my own. This verse inspired me to take a moment, breathe, and look up the My Utmost for His Hightest entry for the day while I sat at lunch; here again, God continued His conversation with me concerning the struggle of the season: http://www.myutmost.org/04/0420.html
“For all the promises of God in Him are yea, and in Him Amen.” 2 Corinthians 1:20 I know that He has promised me a plan for my life, hope, a future, that I’ll find Him when I seek Him with all my heart, that His face will shine upon me, He’ll lead me through the valley, that He loves me deeper than my capacity to comprehend, that I can fall and fall and He’ll be right there to dust me off and push me along, that He is faithful to walk me through His calling on my life, that I am beautiful and lovely and perfect and clean in Him, that He’ll never forsake me, that He is with me always, that He makes ALLLLL THINGS work together for our good, He is my healer, He is my redeemer, He knew me before I was born, He knows the desires and intentions of my heart even when others totally miss them, He makes me whole, He is my rock, there is NOTHING that I could do to make Him love me any less, He is my shelter and my teacher and my father and my biggest fan, He cleans up the messes I make and heals the wounds I unintentionally inflict.
I think we all need to slow down and reaffirm all of these things in our own lives every once in awhile.. it REALLY puts things into perspective and makes everything so much easier to navigate knowing that we really don’t have to have it all together and that even if we really screw up or are hurt somehow, He’s right there with chocolate to comfort, a shoulder to cry on, and a dustpan to clean up along the way. Just be still in the chaos and know that He is so much bigger than the holes we dig.